Today I want to talk about happiness. It’s something we all desire (or claim we desire), but do you really know what it is?
Have you ever thought about your happiness and what causes you to be happy? I’m sure you’ve stated and focused on a desire to be happy, but have you really thought about the process and what it involves?
Using Emotions as Your Guide
Earlier this week I talked about how your emotions and how they feel in your body are your roadmap and compass for life. Your body has far more wisdom than you may realize, or give it credit for. Most commonly it’s known as the intuition or ‘gut feeling’ you receive, but your whole body is constant giving you feedback.
When your body feels light or happy, what you are experiencing is true to your beliefs and experiences; it is the right path.
When your body feels heavy or negative, what you are experiencing is separating and holding you apart from your truths.
How can you use this?
Look for resistances in your life. If you committed to something and are resisting it, explore that feeling. Are you more introverted and just don’t feel like leaving the house? Or do that activity go against your beliefs? Is it something that you don’t want to have more of in your life?
As an introvert, sometimes I just get overwhelmed from everything I’ve committed to. I want to do all these activities, but it also drains me and I’ve learned to say no more, so that I can say yes to me. Taking care of yourself is NOT selfish.
So back to happiness.
Happiness Itself
Happiness is not something that you can find externally. In fact, for the average person, our happiness is only about 10% influenced by external factors.
Happiness comes from within.
The path to happiness comes from using your emotions as your guides.
Happiness comes from seeking those things out that make you feel good. Those things that are in alignment with your greater self. Happiness is hanging around people who make you feel good and engaging in activities that make you feel good (both during and after).
This does not include browsing social media. Social media has become the place that our brain goes to find a quick fix and high, but on-going, most of us feel worse after spending 20-30 sucked into social media.
Happiness will not arrive when you get the promotion, buy the house, get the new client, etc. Happiness does not come from external sources; only you can make yourself happy. It comes from knowing who you are, connection and knowing your purpose. It comes from loving yourself.
Choose to be happy, and you will attract success and happiness to you. This is both proven in the study of Positive Psychology and in Quantum Physics.
That’s the ultimate lesson in life, we think we need to have all of these things to be happy. And while that is an important part of our experience, we actually receive them once we are already happy inside.
Is this something you’re curious about? Let’s talk about how your mindset and beliefs could actually be holding you back from what you desire!
Negative Emotional States – Where Happiness Seems Impossible
When you’re in a negative emotional state is can seem like being happy is beyond your reach. It’s so far away, how will you ever get there? By taking baby steps. When you’re in depression or rage, just feeling hopeful can feel like trying to jump the Grand Canyon.
What you need to do first is be aware of your current emotion. Acknowledge how you are feeling. One trick is to say to yourself “I feel angry right now” or “I feel depressed right now”, then thank yourself for being aware of it “Thank you, ____ (your name), for noticing this.” This brings you into a state of awareness, but also opens the way for gratitude.
Now that you are actually observing your emotions, find something you can do to bring you slightly up the emotional scale (a good referral is the Emotional Guidance Scale from Abraham-Hicks), from depression to insecurity, or rage to revenge. Now these aren’t ‘good’ emotions, but they are a step up from your previous emotion. What you need to do is focus on your win from here.
I consider this pivoting. The faster you can pivot from a negative emotional state and move yourself back to a positive, the faster you will move forward towards your dreams and also return to a state of happiness.
Where have you sought happiness before? …And now realize that it won’t actually make you happy?
What are the things that do make you happy, or the people that you are happy to be around?
One last fact: when there are two people, one is happy and one is negative, it’s impossible for the positive person to pull the negative one up. The negative one will eventually pull the positive one down as it is a heavier emotion. Which person do you want to be? And who are you surrounding yourself with?
Why am I talking about this? Because I’ve done a lot of self-work through business and life coaches to get to the place I am today, and I am so grateful I did it. I hope that something from this inspires you to create a new habit or makes a new positive influence on your life.
And if this intrigues you and you would like to explore further, schedule your Introductory Intuitive Session. I work with my clients to clarify their goals, break through limiting beliefs, set powerful habits to create and follow proven systems to create the lives of their dreams. Because if I can do it, you can too!
